The Surgery Of A Lifetime
After what was another set back for Oliver, needing to go back onto Hi-flow for the extra support. The team of baby doctors had consulted with each other and decided it was time. Oliver was 3kg and at this point it was more of a risk not to do the surgery. He was in heart failure and he was struggling, he had fluid on his lungs which was managed with lasix. (A medicine that helps to drain the fluid, he literally weed it out.) And he was exhausted, his little heart was working over time to do the job it was supposed to do and it just wasn't cutting it anymore.
We moved over from The Woman's Hospital to The Royal Children's Hospital. It was a strange move, very surreal. We had been at The Woman's 11 weeks and as strange is it is, it felt like our home. We knew the nurses, the doctors, our way around the hospital, it was comfortable. Moving to The Children's was daunting, we didn't know the doctors, we hadn't met the surgeons. It was a new social worker and a new bunch of nurses. More people I had to trust with my sons life.
Since the move I knew it was a matter of when he would have surgery. He was on the wait list but when he would have the surgery depended on if their were other emergencies, On Friday the 28th of July the team of doctors came in on the ward round, it was discussed that Oliver would have his AVSD repaired on the 31st of July, the following Monday. So long as no emergencies! I was excited but absolutely terrified at the same time. I knew this surgery meant the end of our journey, finally! But in the same breathe my tiny little baby boy was having a major operation, one that could take his life. It is such a conflicting mix of emotions when you know your baby needs it but you cant fathom it actually happening.
The weekend rolled around and luckily I had an amazing friend visiting at the time, she would be there for the surgery and it meant I had support, Monday rolled around and it was so very strange, I set my alarm for 5am so I could wake up and hold Oliver in my arms until the doctors came to take him to theater at 7:30am. I had not slept a wink and I was exhausted and full of worry. The surgeons walked in and said it was time, I was told the success rate of the surgery looked good but there's always the odd chance something might not go to plan. I was asked to sign a consent form making the hospital not liable in the event of death. It felt more real than ever. I kissed Oliver goodbye and held him tight and off he went. I prayed my baby would be ok and hoped he would continue his fight,
I caught a bus to the mall where I met up with my girlfriend. She hugged me tighter than ever before and I just felt like she was carrying all my weight. I couldn't have spent the day with anyone more amazing than her! she kept me distracted with shopping, food and we had our cards read! we even had a few laughs! The day flew by, and before I knew it I received the call of a lifetime,
I will NEVER forget how I felt in that moment. I was in Myer, looking at the baby beanies. I stood their and looked at my phone, "private number" was flashing in green. I knew it was the hospital and I was almost scared to answer encase it was bad news. I answered and heard the surgeon, "Hi Bianca, its one of the surgeons here from The Royal Children's, the surgery was a complete success."
I literally felt a massive thump hit my body, I froze and felt heavy, shaken, dizzy. I was in utter shock and so very relieved. I just cried, "hes ok, my baby is ok." It brings me to tears as I write this, how I remember the feelings.
I raced back to the hospital as fast as I could, even though I knew he would be in recovery and I was unlikely to see him for a while. But I needed to be there when he was ready, I sat around waiting another 4 hours. Finally able to go and see him at 7pm. I walked in, completely speechless, it was so raw and surreal seeing my baby with so many tubes, and wires. He was intubated and sedated, he was out cold and he couldn't breathe on his own yet, It looked like Oliver but it didn't feel like him. I was devastated, and seeing him that way, in that moment was the hardest part of our whole journey, He was puffy from fluid, swollen and bruised, his little feet and hands were freezing to touch and he just looked lifeless. I remember just staring and watching him, hoping he would wake up, although I knew he wouldn't yet. I lay his own blanket over him and sat with him for a few hours, got the run down of the surgery and was told that the first 24 hours were pretty rocky. His core temperature was high and infection was at the top of everyone's mind. His blood pressure was low and he was pumped full of drugs to increase it. He had pacing wires in his heart to ensure his heart beat at a steady pace, until it knew how to do its new job.
The machine that did his breathing for him was set at 20 breathes per minutes, it was slow and I could see his chest rising and falling with the sound of the machine. He had a line in his neck, and in both arms for all his medications. He had drains in his tummy to drain all the excess fluid in his little body. It was scary and alot to take in, but he was strong and I knew he would fight.
I left for the night and called through the night to check in on him. As expected he had a rough night, struggling to keep his blood pressure up and being pumped full of fluid to help as well as some problems with temperature instability. I went in early the next morning and he was so much more puffy than the day before, but he was stable and doing ok. The next few days Oliver turned a corner, they were able to slowly wean some of his meds and let him start to wake up. On day 4 he was extubated and able to breathe with the support of Hi-Flow until he got use to all the new changes in his little body. It was so nice to see him start to wake but when I looked in his eyes all I saw was pain. It wasn't until around day 6 he started to seem himself again. The fluid had gone down and he was his happy self. From here on out we were one step closer to being on our way home!
The strength that his tiny little body had to undergo such a major surgery at such a small fragile age was an absolute miracle.
I cannot thank the surgeons enough for what they did for my son.
The Nurses for caring for him when I couldn't be their, and for being gentle and loving. I knew he was well looked after and in those circumstances it made all the difference.
I hope I was able to give you a real incite as to what Oliver's surgery was like for us. It truly is hard to put into words and I share my story to give strength and hope to anyone who might be going through something similar,
These little people that we grow, our own little humans are bloody tough and they will fight. xo
We moved over from The Woman's Hospital to The Royal Children's Hospital. It was a strange move, very surreal. We had been at The Woman's 11 weeks and as strange is it is, it felt like our home. We knew the nurses, the doctors, our way around the hospital, it was comfortable. Moving to The Children's was daunting, we didn't know the doctors, we hadn't met the surgeons. It was a new social worker and a new bunch of nurses. More people I had to trust with my sons life.
Since the move I knew it was a matter of when he would have surgery. He was on the wait list but when he would have the surgery depended on if their were other emergencies, On Friday the 28th of July the team of doctors came in on the ward round, it was discussed that Oliver would have his AVSD repaired on the 31st of July, the following Monday. So long as no emergencies! I was excited but absolutely terrified at the same time. I knew this surgery meant the end of our journey, finally! But in the same breathe my tiny little baby boy was having a major operation, one that could take his life. It is such a conflicting mix of emotions when you know your baby needs it but you cant fathom it actually happening.
The weekend rolled around and luckily I had an amazing friend visiting at the time, she would be there for the surgery and it meant I had support, Monday rolled around and it was so very strange, I set my alarm for 5am so I could wake up and hold Oliver in my arms until the doctors came to take him to theater at 7:30am. I had not slept a wink and I was exhausted and full of worry. The surgeons walked in and said it was time, I was told the success rate of the surgery looked good but there's always the odd chance something might not go to plan. I was asked to sign a consent form making the hospital not liable in the event of death. It felt more real than ever. I kissed Oliver goodbye and held him tight and off he went. I prayed my baby would be ok and hoped he would continue his fight,
I caught a bus to the mall where I met up with my girlfriend. She hugged me tighter than ever before and I just felt like she was carrying all my weight. I couldn't have spent the day with anyone more amazing than her! she kept me distracted with shopping, food and we had our cards read! we even had a few laughs! The day flew by, and before I knew it I received the call of a lifetime,
I will NEVER forget how I felt in that moment. I was in Myer, looking at the baby beanies. I stood their and looked at my phone, "private number" was flashing in green. I knew it was the hospital and I was almost scared to answer encase it was bad news. I answered and heard the surgeon, "Hi Bianca, its one of the surgeons here from The Royal Children's, the surgery was a complete success."
I literally felt a massive thump hit my body, I froze and felt heavy, shaken, dizzy. I was in utter shock and so very relieved. I just cried, "hes ok, my baby is ok." It brings me to tears as I write this, how I remember the feelings.
I raced back to the hospital as fast as I could, even though I knew he would be in recovery and I was unlikely to see him for a while. But I needed to be there when he was ready, I sat around waiting another 4 hours. Finally able to go and see him at 7pm. I walked in, completely speechless, it was so raw and surreal seeing my baby with so many tubes, and wires. He was intubated and sedated, he was out cold and he couldn't breathe on his own yet, It looked like Oliver but it didn't feel like him. I was devastated, and seeing him that way, in that moment was the hardest part of our whole journey, He was puffy from fluid, swollen and bruised, his little feet and hands were freezing to touch and he just looked lifeless. I remember just staring and watching him, hoping he would wake up, although I knew he wouldn't yet. I lay his own blanket over him and sat with him for a few hours, got the run down of the surgery and was told that the first 24 hours were pretty rocky. His core temperature was high and infection was at the top of everyone's mind. His blood pressure was low and he was pumped full of drugs to increase it. He had pacing wires in his heart to ensure his heart beat at a steady pace, until it knew how to do its new job.
The machine that did his breathing for him was set at 20 breathes per minutes, it was slow and I could see his chest rising and falling with the sound of the machine. He had a line in his neck, and in both arms for all his medications. He had drains in his tummy to drain all the excess fluid in his little body. It was scary and alot to take in, but he was strong and I knew he would fight.
I left for the night and called through the night to check in on him. As expected he had a rough night, struggling to keep his blood pressure up and being pumped full of fluid to help as well as some problems with temperature instability. I went in early the next morning and he was so much more puffy than the day before, but he was stable and doing ok. The next few days Oliver turned a corner, they were able to slowly wean some of his meds and let him start to wake up. On day 4 he was extubated and able to breathe with the support of Hi-Flow until he got use to all the new changes in his little body. It was so nice to see him start to wake but when I looked in his eyes all I saw was pain. It wasn't until around day 6 he started to seem himself again. The fluid had gone down and he was his happy self. From here on out we were one step closer to being on our way home!
The strength that his tiny little body had to undergo such a major surgery at such a small fragile age was an absolute miracle.
I cannot thank the surgeons enough for what they did for my son.
The Nurses for caring for him when I couldn't be their, and for being gentle and loving. I knew he was well looked after and in those circumstances it made all the difference.
I hope I was able to give you a real incite as to what Oliver's surgery was like for us. It truly is hard to put into words and I share my story to give strength and hope to anyone who might be going through something similar,
These little people that we grow, our own little humans are bloody tough and they will fight. xo
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